Showing Off at Work

If you are a leader for very long, you can expect to have at least one individual under your guidance that is ever seeking attention. Rather than being intentionally difficult these individuals have a strong need for validation. Unfortunately, this may bring them to your door on a too frequent basis as they constantly seek out your blessing.

Your first instinct is to provide the attention. For some, this is a fine way to nudge them back on to their path. They will take the validation as a sign of confidence and run with it.

On the other hand, some will become addicted to your praise and seek it ever more often. Not only will this interrupt with your ability to perform but it will be an enablement of their mal-adaptive needy behavior.

As you can see, each individual requires a customized approach to boost them along on their path. That being said, there are strategies that you can employ as a preventative measure to keep breakdowns from occurring.

1. Extinction. If you simple choose not to acknowledge the cries for attention, you are not supplying the attention the behavior is designed to create. However, like any war or attrition this can be a lengthy process.


2. Sphere of Influence. A simple preventative measure is to insure that you are in close proximity to the individual several times a day. This presence of the alpha leader will sooth the need for attention. Once a sense of security is established you can begin shortening the time you are nearby and abbreviating the frequency as well. Remember, it is paramount that you take gender into consideration. You do not wish your interventions to be misconstrued.


3. Strong Welcome. Being certain that you make a deliberate and sincere welcome to the individual on a daily basis can go for to assuage their need for attention.


4. Physical Contact. Appropriate physical contact is one of the most powerful techniques for building confidence and thereby independence in others. Consider a warm handshake or a supportive pat on the back. Again you must consider gender and temperament. Many persons are extremely uncomfortable with physical contact while others thrive on it. You must know your team.

Elemental Value Added Truth: Most behavior is learned, and can therefor be unlearned or replaced with a more productive behavior.

Dificult People at Work.